 
Lnfant
Member
Username: Lnfant
Post Number: 94
Registered: 05-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 1:58 pm: |    |
hey, Django,
This is prolly a crazy idea…
Invite some reality/fix-it-up show to your house. They would create a "good fiasco" in the hood and also help with supply costs. I wouldn't know which shows to recommend but all that would take is a little research. |
Alley
Member
Username: Alley
Post Number: 533
Registered: 02-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:02 pm: | |
MOVE THAT BUS!
Hey, that might just work if you mentioned you'd like some sort of youth center, too
(Message edited by alley on August 12, 2008) |
Johnlodge
Member
Username: Johnlodge
Post Number: 8133
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:09 pm: | |
quote:MOVE THAT BUS!
Hey, don't move it that far! Hey, where are you going? Hey, that's not the bus driver! |
Jcole
Member
Username: Jcole
Post Number: 3250
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:19 pm: | |
Django, I may have missed some points. Help me out here.
Have they damaged anything? Do they do this rock throwing thing all the time? Do they do it to other people? What other activities do they have? Other vandalism, or other 'good' things? How old are they? Teens, young teens, little kids? Do they hurt pets?
What I'm getting at is this; are they just bored or are they a gang in the making? It depends on that as to what you need to do. |
Sean_of_detroit
Member
Username: Sean_of_detroit
Post Number: 1451
Registered: 03-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:23 pm: | |
 ... me too! |
Viziondetroit
Member
Username: Viziondetroit
Post Number: 1992
Registered: 11-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:23 pm: | |
LOL @ Move that bus. We need that at all the of the city entrances lol. |
Johnlodge
Member
Username: Johnlodge
Post Number: 8134
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:28 pm: | |
ABC's New EXTREME MAKEOVER: CITY EDITION.
Come on Ty, let's see what you got. |
Russix
Member
Username: Russix
Post Number: 111
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:43 pm: | |
Black, white, whatever, there always going to be some bad punk ass kids (maybe i was one of them too). If you can't earn the respect of the neighborhood youth club(street gang) by civil ways then I suggest you get a mean ass dog that they will respect. |
Gazhekwe
Member
Username: Gazhekwe
Post Number: 2458
Registered: 08-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:48 pm: | |
Sirreal, that's why you start with the parents, and NOT about their bad kids, just about general things. They have to get to know you, then they will work on their kids. Start at the top and work down, works every time.
If someone new in the neighborhood is on the wrong foot somehow, it would be nice if somebody came and talked to them, but it sounds like that isn't going to happen, so you have to walk up and knock on some doors yourself. I don't mean to imply you have done something wrong, but, as others have mentioned, your boarded up windows may be sending a somewhat negative message.
I know when we moved into a neighborhood, about a month later, some kids broke one of our big front windows. We put up some cardboard and about a month later, finally got together the money and time to fix it. One of the neighbors came over THEN and said something like, 'It's about time you fixed that window.' I guess the whole joint was watching the hippie freaks to see what they would do, and that unrepaired window gave a bad impression. |
Iheartthed
Member
Username: Iheartthed
Post Number: 3394
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 2:58 pm: | |
quote:We put up some cardboard and about a month later, finally got together the money and time to fix it. One of the neighbors came over THEN and said something like, 'It's about time you fixed that window.' I guess the whole joint was watching the hippie freaks to see what they would do, and that unrepaired window gave a bad impression.
Exactly. If all of your windows are boarded up, the neighbors probably think you're a squatter. |
Jimaz
Member
Username: Jimaz
Post Number: 6076
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 3:22 pm: | |
Yeah, thumbs down on the eye for an eye approach. That's just begging for an escalation. If you don't want to move, you surely don't want an escalation.
I second the suggestion to remove any rocks from the area if that's even possible.
Would it help to provide some alternative, more interesting rock target? Something that makes a satisfying sound or motion when its bullseye is struck might be more challenging than a house. Design it to collect the rocks thrown so they couldn't be reused.
It sure would be nice to hear a success story from someone who had already solved this problem. |
Spitty
Member
Username: Spitty
Post Number: 697
Registered: 07-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 4:11 pm: | |
Seriously, you might think I'm an idiot, but think about who you're dealing with here. They're kids, with probably not much parental guidance, and they probably aren't very open minded. Now put yourself in their shoes. They probably think, "Who the hell lives in a house with boarded up windows besides a weirdo?" Kids that age in the hood have nothing better to do than call each other names and break stuff. You're in a tough spot because you don't want to make it look like you're trying too hard to get the kids to like you because that just comes off creepy. That's why I said to not focus on the kids so much. You should get to know your neighbors and make a few good friends. You're not going to get everyone to like you, but the good ones will get you into the network with the other good neighbors and at least you won't be taking on the whole block by yourself. As far as the kids, if you got involved with coaching nearby, that would be a good way to get a few young allies and maybe their respect for you could rub off on the other kids who are terrorizing you. If nothing else, it would help you understand how kids from your newly adopted hood interact with each other and with adults. |
Wormbookie
Member
Username: Wormbookie
Post Number: 23
Registered: 05-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 4:16 pm: | |
I know it has been said repeatedly, but an "outsider" living in a boarded up house where there are children is not going to fare well in any neighborhood. You should go and talk to the adults and parents not just about their children throwing rocks, but your situation with no windows. This will reassure them that you are not a freak or drug-using squatter.
The parents are probably just as put off by the appearance of your home as the children, but instead of throwing rocks, they might just sit around talking trash about "the weird white guy in the house with no windows".
And btw, just because two of the children are raised by their grandmother, means nothing in terms of how you should handle this situation. Grandparents can be thrown into unfortunate situations, but should still want the best for the children. |
Richard_bak
Member
Username: Richard_bak
Post Number: 346
Registered: 04-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 4:30 pm: | |
I may have missed something earlier in the thread, but why are Django's windows boarded up? Were they constantly being broken, or was there a fire or foreclosure or something? For whatever reason, yeah, I could see that as seeming a bit strange to folks in the neighborhood, esp. kids. Not that it warrants being harassed.
I'm also with that one poster who said he'd go nuts if he had to live inside with no windows. Must be hell on the house plants, too. |
Ravine
Member
Username: Ravine
Post Number: 2550
Registered: 01-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 5:12 pm: | |
The problem with the "eye for an eye" approach is that, after a while, what you end up with is both parties stumbling around missing an assortment of limbs and organs.
Django, I still want to know the answer to my post #2549, above.
I'm in agreement with a couple of points already made, here (particularly some of those asserted by Wolverine.) You're the only white guy on the block, and you're sitting there with a boarded-up house? Do you suppose that you might be sending a "I don't trust the you-know-whats" message? Or, at least, creating the impression that you are a squatter who just appropriated the property? Look, man, fess up: With all the boarded-up, abandoned houses throughout most of the city's neighborhoods, how in the hell do you think the neighbors feel when they see someone move into one of those houses and it continues to sit there, boarded up and still looking like an abandoned eyesore?
I'm not trying to dog you, I'm really not, but I think you may be in a partial state of denial (see my earlier post,) and you are not trying, hard enough, to see yourself as you might look to the folks around you. Right now, you are The White Guy Who Lives In The Boarded-Up House.
You cannot afford to replace broken-out windows, but neither can you afford to continue drawing attention to yourself, which you are doing. You are already the only white guy on the block, right?
Finally, I have to ask Lombaowski about the Do you know how to flirt with black women? remark. What, they're like fuckin' aliens, now? Maybe a trip to the bookstore is in order. Maybe, there is a "Flirting With Black Women For Dummies" book, or one of those Berlitz pocketbooks travellers used to carry. Cripes!
I want to suggest something helpful and realistic, but I don't have much of that; you're in a difficult situation.
About all I can offer is that I think it would be a good idea to zero in on the guys who appear to be the Adult Alpha Males on the block, and try to persuade them to stroll over and share some drinks with you. (You might want to prepare by stocking up on some assorted alcoholic libations: some good beer, and a small assortment of various liquors. And, I'm not trying to project racial stereotypes, here, but most of the guys I know like Hennessey.) When it comes to breaking down barriers, there is nothing like getting together and getting blasted, and if the block's Bull Goose Dominant Alpha Male(s) determine(s) that you are an O.K. guy, your problems will be most of the way to being solved, especially if one of them asks you What's up with the boards, thereby creating an opportunity for you to express your worry about the rock-throwers, which discussion may, in turn, prompt them to put the word out to the little miscreants to Knock That Shit Off.
Edit to correct spelling of Fellow Member's screen-name
(Message edited by ravine on August 12, 2008) |
Wormbookie
Member
Username: Wormbookie
Post Number: 25
Registered: 05-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 5:39 pm: | |
Just as Black women are not aliens, not all Alpha Black males appreciate the odd white guy (that they might already assume is a crackhead) offering them Hennessy to discuss children throwing rocks at his boarded up house.
Approaching the men of the neighborhood is a good idea, but show them that you are kind and harmless without the alcohol. |
Sumas
Member
Username: Sumas
Post Number: 204
Registered: 01-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 6:59 pm: | |
Maybe a little aside from the point. A few month es back a gang of kids (8-12 years old) were hanging out across the street. The neighbors dog was barking and they were throwing rocks at the dog. First I went out and told them to stop, they didn't, then my husband went out with the same message. Defiantly, they stuck around. We debated calling the cops but did't. My 88 year old mother came home and we told her what was happening. She marched right across the street, told them to leave or she was calling the cops. They left. Maybe you need to borrow a grumpy old lady. |
Richard_bak
Member
Username: Richard_bak
Post Number: 351
Registered: 04-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 7:14 pm: | |
There may something to that. My grandma was only 5 feet tall, but she had a bulldog countenance and Ah-nold-like guns poking out of her sleeveless housedress. She didn't take crap from anyone, least of all her four troublesome grandsons. Don't know why, but there's something about being old and righteous that can put a troublemaker to shame.
On the other hand, some punks can just as easily smack a bottle over Grandma's head as your own. So, maybe better to leave Granny in the kitchen in these dust-ups. |
Grumpyoldlady
Member
Username: Grumpyoldlady
Post Number: 197
Registered: 06-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 7:51 pm: | |
Django....I am pleased that my ideas have been met with approval. I am NOT saying have a mini block party with flyer invitations. Just an impromptu setting up of your grill and you sitting there cooking and eating hot dogs, informally offering one to the kids that are nearby. Would see more friendly and less like you have a motive. Also, if the kids are going to throw rocks, how about setting up a board with holes in it and point values assigned...like a bean bag toss, and give them something to throw at. That is just off the top of my head...might want to think it through first. |
Dave70
Member
Username: Dave70
Post Number: 60
Registered: 08-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 8:04 pm: | |
"To me, it's sad because we're all here giving advice on what Django can do, but in honesty, it should be a two way street. The neighbors shouldn't judge him based on the color of his skin, yet I haven't seen the thread started on the neighbors complaning about what problems the 'white guy' is causing. I'm somewhat skeptical about the advice of befriending the neighbors, because the parents are probably the ones planting these seeds in the heads of the kids, because they had to have gotten the underlying feelings causing this from somewhere, and I'm really thinking 'Parents' would be the number one answer if this were a question on the Family Feud."
Yup, I've always thought that the posters on this forum are a TINY minority of people who care about the city. And, I'll bet none of the jackasses who are the criminals/troublemakers EVER read this forum. |
Focusonthed
Member
Username: Focusonthed
Post Number: 1973
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 8:17 pm: | |
Sumas and Richard_bak, who do you think controls Hamtramck? The Polish grandmothers, not the Police, lol. |
Ravine
Member
Username: Ravine
Post Number: 2553
Registered: 01-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 8:48 pm: | |
Wormbookie, perhaps I failed to clearly express my suggestion. The idea isn't to draw the guys over with the intention of weakening them with cognac before pleading the case regarding the rock-throwing kids. The idea is to be a good New Neighbor by introducing oneself and inviting the fellas to come over for drinks. It shrinks down the distance between folks who do not yet know each other; it creates an opportunity for each party to discover that the other ain't so bad. I admit that my suggestion of zeroing in on the Dominant Alpha Male(s) carries a specific intent which goes beyond mere Good Neighborliness, but I'm trying to help Django, here, with his specific problem. If the topic of the rock-throwing comes up, that's good; if it doesn't, the get-together is still a good idea, in my opinion. As for the alcohol, I stand by my original reasoning. Besides, while showing that you are "kind and harmless" is worthwhile, it is not quite as friendly (and generous!) as welcoming the fellas to share, with you, some of your booze.
And, it figures that somebody would lock onto my Hennessey reference. |
Plymouthres
Member
Username: Plymouthres
Post Number: 849
Registered: 02-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 9:55 pm: | |
Now that I am out of the pressure cooker of work, I may be able to provide a rational response to your questions, D! I apologize for going off on Craig, but I am so sick of people just usurping others and I get a bit pissed when I hear of all of the racial intonations that go along with all of these incidents.
Coward was a bad word to use in this situation, as not everyone is as determined to make stand as I am. I mis-spoke and apologize for that. I was in no way calling you out personally, so don't take it that way. Just try to understand that I take seriously the effort I put forth now and have put forth in the past very seriously, as I have seen the results of those actions pay off in droves, and persistance does pay off in the end, even when all seems lost.
It bothers me that instead of just being an issue with kids vs. adult(s), it ends up being a black white thing, with snide remarks thrown in just for "laughs". There is not one thing funny about situations like these, and there are no easy answers, either.
Here's a good idea for getting the kids involved in "throwing" something other than rocks. Why don't you get a wiffle ball and bat and start hitting the ball around your yard a bit? Better yet, maybe a bunch of us adults (both black AND white) could get together and come down there and play a game together or something that would better illustrate how people should treat one another? Maybe if the kids saw something a bit more constructive, you could ask them to join in, too. Then they would be a part of it, rather than apart from it, you know? After that you could do the bbq thing, which gets you two points rather than just one.....just a thought.
Someone has to take the lead, it should be easier if you have a purpose.... |
Alley
Member
Username: Alley
Post Number: 535
Registered: 02-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 10:16 pm: | |
Call me crazy, but I'm not going to kiss anyone's ass just to get them to treat me with average decency. All these friendly ideas look really nice on paper, but will they be received in the way you hope? You've tried offering to fix things, the garden idea, etc and it hasn't made too much of a difference. Where do you draw the line? I know there are a lot of great people out there, but there are also a lot of jerks who will take what you give and still treat you poorly. If these kid's parents haven't taught them to behave so far, it'll probably be a little more labor-intensive than cooking hotdogs for them to earn their respect. Please don't take that the wrong way, it's coming from the most positive corner of negativity |
Bvos
Member
Username: Bvos
Post Number: 2305
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 10:27 pm: | |
Django, you're in it for the long haul so show your neighbors that you intend to be here for the long haul. Don't put up with shit and don't let folks walk on you. On the same hand don't get bent out of shape over little stuff too often. I don't think anyone will fault you for snapping at the kids throwing rocks at you. A similar thing happened to me and the neighbors noticed and have respect for me now that I stood up to the punk asses and their parents.
You've got to know when to have righteous indignation and when to bite your tongue and let it go. If you keep up with things and don't let the idiots win, you'll get respect over the long run. |
Kathinozarks
Member
Username: Kathinozarks
Post Number: 1379
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 11:20 pm: | |
Damn, Django. What are you trying to do?
You live in a house with boards for windows? How can anyone give you any advice when you live in a house with boards for windows?
When those kids in your neighborhood are grown adults they will most certainly talk about the 'crazy white guy' who lived in the house with boarded up windows!
SOMEONE OFFER DJANGO SOME FREE PLEXIGLASS - NOW!! |
Kathinozarks
Member
Username: Kathinozarks
Post Number: 1380
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 11:26 pm: | |
I'll make my last post clear. It kind of reads mean-spirited, but it isn't. Django seems like a swell guy and since there are so many people helping with the community garden with Cub and so many other city improvement areas, I'm thinking that some of you (who live in the city) might be able to help Django. Because, truly, he seems to be in quite a spot. |
Cub
Member
Username: Cub
Post Number: 712
Registered: 02-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 12, 2008 - 11:57 pm: | |
You know I am there for you D! Whatever we can set up. Hell I will even talk to the kids if you want. |
Kathinozarks
Member
Username: Kathinozarks
Post Number: 1381
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 12:01 am: | |
YAY CUB! |
Kennyd
Member
Username: Kennyd
Post Number: 32
Registered: 04-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 12:49 am: | |
quote:SOMEONE OFFER DJANGO SOME FREE PLEXIGLASS - NOW!
I think Django said the house was boarded up BEFORE he moved in, and that folks might have appreciated the fact he unboarded them when he moved in.
Correct me if I'm wrong. |
Barnesfoto
Member
Username: Barnesfoto
Post Number: 5345
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 2:11 am: | |
some of his windows are boarded, but in an artsy way... You just have to see it to appreciate it...There are far more eccentric houses than Django's on the east side.
And one of Django's problems is that there's not many other houses on his block, so his supply of "neighbors" is limited. |
Django
Member
Username: Django
Post Number: 1639
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 3:21 am: | |
I just wrote out a long response to everyone but somehow lost it all while checking an incoming e mail. I didn't expect so many responses but find it interesting to see them all. Ive been making notes. Give me a day to write up a new response.
Special Thanks to Grumpy, Res, Cub, Dodger, DTLady, Gnome, Pgn, Sean_of_D, Tkierpiec, Hamtragedy, Lombaowski. I will be in touch.
I want to give a super special Kiss My A** to whoever posted the molester cartoon video above^^^^^^^^
(Message edited by django on August 13, 2008)
(Message edited by django on August 13, 2008) |
Django
Member
Username: Django
Post Number: 1640
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 3:26 am: | |
"It's better to regret something you have done, than to regret something you haven't done" |
Grumpyoldlady
Member
Username: Grumpyoldlady
Post Number: 198
Registered: 06-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 5:41 am: | |
Django....if I didn't live almost 900 miles away, I'd take you up on the offer of stopping by for a cool one or a hot dog. I hope my idea helps, but don't count on it. |
Django
Member
Username: Django
Post Number: 1643
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 7:09 am: | |
I know you would Grumpy, Your idea was more than enough.
Gotta go back to bed now, for a few more hours anyway. |
Grumpyoldlady
Member
Username: Grumpyoldlady
Post Number: 199
Registered: 06-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 13, 2008 - 8:00 am: | |
Back to bed....sounds like a plan! G'nite/g'morning all. ZZZZZzzzzzzzzz. |
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